Passing the Expat Baton...STICK! (Part 2)

By:  Brittany S

Now I know after reading the last post, I may have come off as a bit snooty, unapproachable, or full of attitude to some, and to others, I may have just been keeping it real.  But whatever your response to my initial post was, here is the softer side.  I offer you the cold side of the pillow; this is what happens when I am able to help someone become an expat, or at least an international traveler, for the first time.








First, a little about me:
(For the avid readers of my posts, you have probably read this once before, so you can skip to the next section.)  I'm a mid-20s, single, childless Black American living in Korea.  I grew up in several multi-generational households, with an average anywhere between 5-9 people in one 3-bedroom home.  Can you believe my mother was a single parent and I was an only child with those numbers!?  Let's just say "life for me ain't been no crystal stair."  My predominantly Black high school lost its accreditation the year after I graduated and what I learned (at a different high school) my freshman year was repeated over the next 3 years, ultimately putting me far behind my collegiate classmates.  My counselor tried to prepare me for a community college or the military.  She never even mentioned a four-year university and beyond.  My school's expectations for me were clear; I won't go far in life.

When I went off to a predominantly White institution, I noticed how different I was from them in life experiences and preparedness.  They all went on Spring Break trips around the country in high school (You mean you didn't just go to grandma's?) and around Europe as a senior class trip (My school allowed us to sell candy bars to go to DC, but that's as far as we got).  And in college?  They came in their freshman year with almost enough credits to make them sophomores.  They studied abroad and took family vacations out of the country.  Their two-story brick homes were renovated to add an additional room (Sometimes we lived in one-bedroom apartments with 3 people).  They knew about when they were going to get married, where they would live, and what they would do for work.  Some of them already had job offers before they even applied (Why don't I know anyone who can offer ME a job?).

Seriously?  Am I the ONLY one who doesn't have this all figured out?  (redsuspenders.tumblr.com)

After I got over my self-pity, or even past the blaming institutional racism for my plight, I realized that I was now in the same classrooms and same school as them.  I had a lot of the same resources available to me, and I had the power to change my situation.  Granted, there was a little more of a struggle financially (so I worked three jobs every semester), but I now had a CHOICE.  I could determine my future, or blame my past for my present.  I chose the former.  In 2007, I studied abroad in London for 6 weeks over the summer, as the only person from my state in the program.

Here I am six years later, living in South Korea.  People ask me questions all the time, but my favorite is when people just want to know my story.  Everyone likes telling stories, especially the ones they were able to author.  I have told people about my experiences before and after I became an expat and in doing so, I have planted a seed and/or nourished a dormant curiosity within them.  I think the best part about my story is when people tell me they can't do what I'm doing, I say "Why not?  I did it.  What makes you so different?"  When they sincerely consider this question and come to the realization that our differences aren't too many, then the real conversation begins.

Since I have been abroad, I have been able to help people find jobs abroad, and leave America for the first time, visit a foreign country for the first time (strictly as a tourist and not on military orders).  I must say I absolutely LOVED sharing in their expat "firsts".

Yep, that about sums it up. (kyssthis16.tumblr.com)

Finding a Job Abroad:  College Friend

My second job in Korea was a 6-month appointment to a rural elementary school.  I thought this was the perfect time-fill as I graduated from college in December and planned to teach in America in the fall.  Well, being in Korea as an employee instead of a student changed my outlook on expat living.  Six months is too short!  So, I decided to stay.  My friend from back home was in the same transitory state in her life, so I suggested that she came to Korea to do the same program I had just completed.  After a few conversations back and forth, she took me up on my offer and we got started on her application.  Because I had already gone through the same program, I was able to give her insider tips that helped her make a smoother transition than some of her peers.  I also was her reassuring voice, as she quickly saw how few people like "us" were expats and how intimidating this new form of solitude could be.
I remember the many times of her being lost in translation and navigation, not understanding the currency conversion or the language, and struggling to figure out something (seemingly) as simple as what to order from the menu.  And then I remember her traveling to three different countries with me in the same week, making friends with the locals, speaking and reading Korean, and telling people back home about how this could be their life, too.  She was an expat.
I was sad when it was time to see her off, but I was glad that not only did this experience change the lives of her students forever, but it has forever made her aware of global citizenship, expat living, and ultimately made her a better person.  I am so excited to see what the future holds for her.

She CONQUERED Asia...now all of her thoughts are global.  I'm so proud of her!

Traveling as a Tourist:  Sorority Sister

One of my favorite things about being in a Sorority is that I will be able to find another Soror just about anywhere I go.  When I moved to Korea, I joined one of our International Alumnae chapters and connected with my Sorors across the country.  Many of the chapter's membership consisted of members of the military.  I planned a trip with one of them to Japan.  She had never traveled abroad as a tourist before, only as a soldier.  She was so excited!  Even though both of us lived in Korea, I was able to teach her something new about expat life on this trip.  There were a couple times she found herself being surprised (disappointed) that everyone didn't speak English and/or that USD were not accepted everywhere.  But after a while, she got the hang of things and was able to communicate with the locals in a more effective way and master public transportation.  After this trip with me, she planned a SOLO trip to a couple other Asian countries.  Man, even I haven't done that yet!







Welcome Abroad:  Old Flame

There's something exciting about being able to share something you really love with someone you really love.  A blast from my past decided that he wanted to come visit me in Korea and I couldn't have been happier.  He was my first and only visitor abroad from back home.  There was so much I wanted to show him but only had a short amount of time!  And it didn't help that he came in the middle of Korea's winter.  HARSH.
I took him to meet me Korean family and even though my "brother" and one of my "sisters" don't really speak English, we were able to speak enough broken English and Korean to each other to communicate.  They wanted to get a feel for my friend and see how much he could drink (actually, they offered him their homemade raspberry wine, which Koreans believe aides a man in um...well...you know...).



It was really great that we were able to visit a Fire Station and interact with everyone, even the Chief (can you tell which one is the chief from the picture?  Look at the clothes.)  He is a fireman in his hometown and wanted to see how similar and different his profession is abroad.  They were honored to have him and he was honored to have had that experience.



This was his first trip abroad.  He purchased a passport and traveled 24 hours by himself into a country whose native language is not English.  Now that's brave.  My first trip abroad was to London!  I hope that through this exposure, he now feels the world is bigger than his neighborhood and country and that it is his to explore!  I'm glad I was able to awaken in him a new curiosity.



Ultimately, it is moments like these that won't allow me to throw in the towel on travel guidance for others.  I hope the three of them continue to travel throughout their lives.  If not, at least their perspectives on life and the world will forever be altered at least somewhat.  I know they've altered mine.  I'm glad someone was able to take my baton and keep the travel bug alive.  Have you inspired someone to travel lately?

Passing the Expat Baton...But They Aren't Catching Up! (Part 1)

By:  Brittany S

My face when the interviews begin...dude, I just wanna enjoy the ride sometimes!

We've all experienced it:  the moment when someone asks you questions about the expat experience and you cringe.

You cringe not because you are unhappy abroad or with the person, it’s the question that unnerves you.  I'm sure even now, you are sitting there reading this nodding, pursing your lips, and saying "mmmhmmmm..." and immediately at least 5 questions come to mind  (and the  responses that occur in our minds):

What do you do over there? ("Just anybody can go over there?")

• Nothing.  I sit in a temple and am writing my own "Eat, Pray, Love".  ("I'm not trained, educated, or certified at all so since they chose me over the chimp and the robot they were considering, I guess they really DO just let anyone over here!)

Where exactly are you?  ("Are you in North or South Korea?")

• Seriously?  Even if you don't know the difference between Dhaka and Dakar, or Liberia and Libya, how could you NOT know about BOTH North AND South Korea right now?!  PSY has made everyone look at South Korea, North Korea’s nuclear threats made everyone look at North Korea.  Both of these countries, if they were not on your radar before, 2012-13 should DEFINITELY have put them there.  So why do you keep asking me which Korea I'm in!?  Or worse, if I'm in China (a place a lot of Koreans consider old, outdated, and dirty) or Japan (Korea's sworn enemy...well...outside of themselves)?  Wild card, I'm in Indonesia. 

Did you really just ask that?  Look at my face.  C'mon son...

 

Do they speak English there?  (And/or "Can you speak [Korean] fluently yet?")

• Hmmm...the only language that I speak IS English and I have a job TEACHING ENGLISH...at the very least...the people around me speak at least enough English for me to have a job and comfortable lifestyle. (And how many years did we study Spanish and/or French in school and still can't speak it?  How many Americans do you know that can't even speak English?  So why would I be fluent by now?)

Are there Black people there?

• OMG...they must think I'm Michael Jackson now. O.o

Wait, you mean I'm the only one?  So who are all these Brothas&Sistas of South Korea?

 

What do you eat? ("Do they really eat dog?" or "What else do they eat besides sushi?" -_-)

• It's funny how people feel "cultured" when they can use chopsticks, go to a Chinese Buffet or have sushi, but they think when you are actually IN these countries you are eating dogs beat over the head with a rock.  I have actually become a scavenger and I eat whatever I can find on the ground.

We get asked these questions so often, that I'm starting to think expats need to carry an information card as a courtesy to pass out when we spark their expat curiosity.  If somehow you were able to answer the above questions through your teeth and they are still attentive, they fire off another line of questioning:

"Sooo...I've been thinking about doing what you're doing (even though the previous questions I asked let you know that I don't actually KNOW what you're doing...), so how do I get started?  I wanna try and move there in like a month."

• I give a list of websites to start job searches in different countries, recommend that they submit the fingerprints for the FBI background check and go apply for a passport as soon as possible to get them started.  However, when I try to talk about timelines and hiring patterns with people, I swear it goes in one ear and out the other.  I guess this is a good thing because they don't waste their money on that paperwork when they change their mind about their sporadic decision to move abroad.  For those who show a little bit more promise, I help them consider different countries and some resources (including people) there.  However, it seems like people don't make it past this step.  You can lead a horse to water...

"Do you like it there?"

• I'm not sure if the fact that I've been abroad for more than 2 years, write for a travel blog, keep a separate blog solely dedicated to the awesome moments that happen at my job,  and post tons of pics and funny posts on Facebook is enough to say I like it.  I need to stop having people think I'm so miserable.

"Do they have (xyz product, food, or business) there?"

• I want to say "let me Google that for you" or hit them with the actual link.  I mean, must I spell out EVERYTHING?  Almost all of these questions have already been answered by SOMEBODY, SOMEWHERE.  They are all just as sick of these questions as I am, so they’ve created blogs, documents, web pages, etc so that you...the one who wants to do what they are already doing...can show some initiative and do some research!  Granted, it is easier for you to ask us directly (and when the moon is full, we do actually genuinely enjoy being your source of info), and even more trustworthy in your eyes, but you are not the only person we know who wants to use us as their resource.  Think about how many times we have had to say the SAME thing.  And it becomes even more frustrating when...

"Mmm...I decided not to do it.  I mean, I don't wanna have to live in a whole 'nother country...so I'mma just stay here...you have fun with that."

• #(#*%(@&@$(&!!!!!!!  Seriously!?  After picking our brains, and in the rare case that we think you might 

         A--be serious about coming over
         B--be able to handle expat life and blossom abroad and
         C--not be an obnoxious embarrassment to our race and/or nationality
   
         and decided to fully help you, you back out!?

Are you KIDDING ME?!

I know some of you agree with me and share my frustrations, while others are questioning why I’m so bitter towards these questions.  "Didn't someone help YOU out?" you may wonder (No, but that isn’t the point).  I cherish this experience and as the expats these people know, we are gatekeepers in a way.  We are their lead into this world.  It’s an honor to have people look at me and become at least curious about a whole new world.  And as someone on the other side, I’d love to help others and share this world with them.  But, I’ve also seen countless people that have no business being abroad, and it makes me take the gatekeeper role a bit more seriously.

I’ll never tell anyone they SHOULDN'T go abroad, but I definitely won't spoon-feed someone who already feels entitled to everything from the beginning.  If you feel I MUST help you, must answer your every question in detail, directly, and immediately, and that the country MUST have this, this, and this, or you will NOT stay, and that you already "know" what it’ll be like (including what the people are like), then you don't need my help.  In my opinion, you want this life for the wrong reasons, and if you plan to pursue it, do it without my guidance.  And for those who I do fully offer guidance, it’s frustrating when you don't take some ownership over your own curiosity.  I don't have a side gig as the "middle man" to expat life.  And as much as I would love to see you abroad, it is tiresome and burdensome to have to KEEP reinventing the wheel for one person at a time, for the duration of my life abroad.  Please earnestly do your research and look to me for GUIDANCE, not INSTRUCTION.

'D' is for DO some homework...and DON'T pester your expat friend!

For those abroad, how do you handle these questions?


Here's how a couple of my friends have handled it.

Check out Kaylee's detailed blog on  how to become a teacher in South Korea.

or Perl's video series on how to get a visa.

For those wanting to go abroad, what are you doing yourself to make that happen?

“I Wish Things Were Like This At Home…”

By:  Brittany S

While I was sitting there looking at her that’s when it hit me; things are different because of me.  How could I have been so naïve to that fact?

I just moved to a new city three weeks ago and I have a new “best friend”.  Now of course we aren’t true best friends—the type that go in each other’s fridges, know each other’s parents’ phone numbers, been each other’s wingman then shoulder to cry on after the breakup.  We’re not even the besties that use the bathroom and talk to each other while the other is in the shower (Too far?).

"You and me must ne-vah part...ma-tee-da-da."

But, if anyone knows what is going on with me and/or where I am, she does.

But how is this possible in such a short time?  Two words:  FOREIGNER FRIENDLY.  These words mean more to me than just that that locals welcome/embrace foreigners or that there is an English translation available.  It means when foreigner meets foreigner, we (generally) become really friendly!  Initially knowing our only commonalities to be English speaker and non-Korean, we are more willing to do a lot of things within the first 24-48 hours of “knowing” each other:

·         Exchange phone numbers

·         Add each other on social media sites (Facebook, Twitter, etc)

·         Tell each other where we work and live (and sometimes even give each other the key codes to get into each other’s apartment buildings/rooms) as well as how/why we are in Korea and where we are from

·         Go to each other’s apartments

·         Go to dinners, bowling parties, etc and not know a single person in attendance

·         Hug or have some other form of familial physical contact

·         Ask for and/or offer career advice

·         Give or loan goods and services

I don't even know them.  I invited them to sing w/us & they were HILARIOUS.  I don't think I would be so "friendly" in the middle of the night if we were stateside.

All of this is possible without even knowing each other’s last name!  It may seem as though these newly-formed relationships are superficial (and in some cases, they are), but we sincerely develop somewhat intimate relationships with each other in an astoundingly short time.  It’s human nature to seek out those who are similar to us.  Whether our similarities be along the lines of race, gender, sexuality, class, beliefs, etc, we feel most comfortable among our own.  Do you remember where you sat in the high school cafeteria?  The need to belong and be accepted is great among the human race and we thrive off of some kind of interaction with others.

Yea, I think it is a little like "Mean Girls"...even where you SIT determines sooo much about you smh.

In a country where English is not the native tongue, I’ve come to realize how important verbal communication is and isn’t at the same time.  It amazes me how my eyes would light up when I saw another foreigner walking the streets, as something as basic as being able to talk to them excited me.  If we ever had the chance to formally meet, we would have started to see a place in each other’s lives.  And yet, there are moments where all we share is a laugh and that's enough of a language to know what the other person wants to say.  But why can’t things be like this at home (in America)?

How many people in this picture do you think speak English?  I'll give you a hint, only the ones that look like me do.  We communicate with more than just vocabulary.

While I was sitting there looking at her that’s when it hit me; things are different because of me.

At the risk of making us sound like participants in a salivating dog experiment, we are conditioned to think and behave in a certain way from birth.  The socialization in America is phenomenal.  I’m sure we can all think of people who vote Republican because their father does and that’s just “the way things are.”  Or the girl who won’t tell anyone she likes Winnie the Pooh because her friends said liking cartoon characters is for babies.  There is a suppressed personality inside of all of us; putting yourself in unfamiliar surroundings allows for it to come out.

When you get off the plane, you are filled with a spectrum of emotions and questions.  As time goes on, you start to balance out, but your personality and character exponentially develops.  Just in my brief stint abroad, I have seen/done/learned so much. (Click here to see a little more of my travel story!)  Some things are forever changed in me.

·         I love to travel.  Someone once said the adult sticker book is a passport.  I wholeheartedly agree.  Every time I get a new stamp I feel the same exhilaration as getting a new Lisa Frank sticker book (remember those?).

·         KARAOKE. ANYTIME. ANYPLACE. WITH ANYONE. YES. YES. YES!!!

Can you believe we are at a BOWLING ALLEY?! Yea, we got hard in the paint for some karaoke!

·         I am unique.  That is a stronger, more positive word than “different.”  I embrace it.  If people don’t understand my fashion choices for instance, it is because the pants I wear are Thai pants and my jewelry is from Jamaica and Malaysia.  I can’t expect them to be accepting, or even understanding of me.  They haven’t been unplugged as I have.  It’s ok.  They don’t know any better. ;-)

·         Food is delicious almost EVERYWHERE.  You just have to be willing to try it (and at times, get over the presentation or ingredients of it)!

This food looked a little like vomit haha but as you can see, we devoured it.

·         Most importantly, I’ve learned that it is ok to be yourself.  It is almost required.  Oscar Wilde once said “Be yourself, everyone else is already taken.”  No matter whom you choose to be, make sure that is who you really are.  Even when we say someone dances to the beat of their own drummer, that still means it is them and the drummer!  Don’t hide who you are in fear of isolation.  If we are our true selves, we will attract the correct circle around us.

I pretty much met them all the same night.  We ended up having dinner & spending HOURS thinking we are Whitney/Mariah/Toni/Janet haha.  Now we hang out regularly & I've even had a sleepover with one of them!

Traveling has allowed me to come to my own resolutions about these and many other things at warp speed.  I think this is perhaps why things are so different here than back home, especially in terms of relationships.  All the highs and lows we would experience with people back home is fast-forwarded here.  In our familial surroundings, we listen to family, friends, media, politics, religion, etc.  When you move to a place where no one knows your face, name, or even language, an enormous socialization burden is lifted.  A lot of societal voices are silenced.  When our own voice is the most clear, so is our sense of direction and purpose; so are we.

Thanks Abbie! (My new hair stylist haha you like?)

As bizarre as it may sound, I came to all these conclusions one day when I was out with my new bestie and chuckling at how we already have inside jokes and each other’s back stories.  My guard is completely down with her and many others I encounter here.  I pray I never feel the need to throw up a wall again when I move on from this place.  So here’s to Abbie, who unknowingly helped me to realize that it isn’t necessarily Korea specifically that changed my behavior, but my own maturity when I allowed my voice to be the only one to speak for me.  Silence is more than golden; it's eye-opening.

**If you can’t afford to travel internationally, I highly recommend domestic travel to place totally unfamiliar to you.  The silence is there for everyone, you just have to find it.

Pajamas, Ice Cream, Reflections and a Destiny Fulfilled

By: Brittany S

BRITTANY (BRIT a nee; not to be confused with BRIT-nee): the English translation of the French region, Bretagne, settled by the Britons (British).  The name means “Land of the Britons.”

NOMMO:  interpreted as the Afrocentric principle of the creative power of a word; a word’s power to speak things into existence.  Originally derived from the Dogon people of Central Africa and rebirthed by African American Rhetorical Scholar Molefi Asante.

My mother always told me that I need to “speak things into existence.”  If I want to succeed, don’t say I will fail; say I have already succeeded all expectations.  I really like “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you are right.” –(Henry Ford)

What's worse is I used to sign my name like this, too.

But yet, my mother named me after a chipmunk.

If you remember “Alvin and the Chipmunks” and the girls, or the “Chipettes,” then you might know from where my name came.  I’m not sure where my middle name (Nicole) came from, but it almost seems like in the mid 80s (at least in the Midwest anyway) almost every “Brittany” was a “Brittany Nicole.”  “Nicole” is of Greek origin and means “victorious people.”  My last name is actually a made-up name and the only people I know with that name are my family members.

So why tell you all about my name?  As I said, I believe in nommo.  Now that isn’t to say you can just speak something into existence and POOF! there it is (“faith without works is dead”), but I am saying there is something in a name.  You ever look at someone and thought “Yea she looks like a Stephanie” or “everyone I know named ‘Paris’ is pretty” or something like that?  I know I have.  If we hear someone’s (American) name is hyphenated like “Billy-Bob” or “Sallie-Mae,” we automatically associate them with a rural/country upbringing.  If we hear a name with a bunch of hyphens, dashes, or extra letters, we associate that with something, too.  There is something in a name.

In short, my name speaks to Britain and France (Brittany), victorious people (Nicole), and trailblazing (my last name is made-up remember?).  One of those bored, sitting-in-pjs-all-day-eating-ice-cream-out-of-the-pint type of summer days I reflected on my name and my life experiences.  My first international trip was to London (with a weekend in France), even though I went through hell and back to get there (alone).  As a matter of fact, almost every major international journey I have made has had its hiccups.  But, my fighting, “victorious” spirit wouldn’t give up and I am so thankful that I didn’t.  I’m doing these people in my family have never even dreamed of and I’m leading the way for those around me (family/friends/associates/mentees) to do the same.

I didn’t write this snippet of my life so that you can get busy Googling your name and reevaluating your life (although I am curious to hear if anyone else has a name that can be translated to speak more on who they are/want to be).  I wrote it because it was on this particular pj Saturday that I realized that I was/am doing exactly what I was called to do.  I felt a sense of purpose in this new hobby.  Ever heard of the chaos theory or butterfly effect?

Learned about it from this movie haha don't judge me.  It's a real theory!

In short, the chaos theory refers to seemingly unrelated events that in reality are all connected and the slightest change in the initial conditions can have the biggest impact on the outcome.  Although this is more of a mathematical concept than anything else, in application, I’ll just say this.  Now that I am where I am, looking back, I have realized there are a lot of random things in my life that had things been different even slightly; I would not be where I am today.  I’ll even include my name.  If my mother preferred another chipette or maybe another cartoon altogether, what would my name be?

If I didn’t win a study abroad scholarship would I have ever sought out a program?  What if I graduated from college earlier or later?  What if I got that summer job that I REALLY wanted and was devastated that I didn't get it (after all, this job is the reason I had nothing to do over the summer and got bored so applied to leave the country)?  There are so many things that happened exactly as they needed to (even though they weren’t the way I wanted them to) so that things would be the way they are.  It all makes sense now.  My take home message out of my rambling is this:  even though things are not always the way you wish they were, sometimes things are not the way they seem.  Whatever you may be going through right now is preparing in you some way for what is to come.  Who knows, maybe it'll lead to you deciding to trade it all in and go abroad, too.  Ultimately, I think traveling is a great way to start over.  One thing is for sure; being abroad makes you do a lot of soul-searching.  For me, I am realizing that not every rough patch is without its flower.    Not all “chaos” is bad! :-)

BTW, did the title make anyone else think of this?  No?  Yea, no, me neither...heh heh

Top 7 Out-of-the-Box Experiences in Korea That Are Worthwhile

By:  Brittany S

Traveling to a different country doesn't always have to mean you want to visit the tallest building, location where something was filmed, or museums (or something equally historical and/or insightful).  Why not do some of the fun stuff that the locals do?  Doesn't saying you ran with the bulls in Barcelona sound so much cooler than you watched a bullfight in your home country?  Here are a few ways to make these kind of memories in Korea.

7--Visit “Dr. Fish”  (Gangnam, S. Korea)

Although you can do this in other countries, I’ve read the best reviews about doing it in Korea.  Stick your feet in a tank with two different kinds of fish that will eat the dead skin—a natural pedicure!

Things to Do:

Wear loose clothes so you can roll them up and keep them dry.

Enjoy gelato/waffle/coffee/smoothie before you go to the tank.

Keep a tight grip on your camera so you don’t drop it in the water!

Things to Remember:

Don’t put on a lot of moisturizer the day you get ready to go.

6--Receive training and fly a plane same day! (Gimpo, S. Korea)

I wouldn’t recommend coming all the way to Korea just to do this, but if you are already planning a trip there, why not take things to the next level?  The pilot is British so don’t worry about language barriers.  You will either fly a 2 or 4-seater plane with his assistance.  It’s pretty cool!

Things to Do:

Dress in layers. The temperature will vary on and off the ground.

Taxi the plane on the runway.

Take control of the plane in the air, both turning & balancing it out.

Wear a headset and communicate with Air Traffic Control and your co-pilot.

Things to Remember:

Take your time moving the controls. It only requires small adjustments.

The instructor has a set of controls, too.  You’re in good hands.

You can only take pictures in designated areas ONLY.

5--Visit the “Love Castle” (Gyeongju, S. Korea)

I couldn’t help but giggle like a schoolgirl at this museum.  From penis chairs, sex toys, and karma sutra instructional videos to fetish displays and animal porn, this museum has enough to keep you smirking.  In spite of its description, it’s not a sleezy place and you will oftentimes see timid couples going there for a date.

Things to Do:

He's such a good kisser. ;-)

Take at least one inappropriate picture with a statue (oh c’mon…you’re at a SEX MUSEUM!)

Be prepared to be shocked, embarrassed, and/or curious, etc.

Go with someone you’re dating or make it a girls’ night out

Watch the kama sutra video while sitting on penis chairs in a dimly lit room

Things to Remember:

Don’t do anything there that you wouldn’t want others to find out about (employers, etc).

This place mainly focuses on the aesthetics of sex and love.

4--Eat LIVE Octopus!  (Seoul, S. Korea)

Ok I’m not gon’ lie, I haven’t done this one…yet.  I have to work my way up to it! Not only is eating live octopus a little like something off “Fear Factor” for many of us (it actually was a Fear Factor challenge), but if eaten incorrectly, you could choke and die!  It is only second to blowfish as the most dangerous food to eat in the world. (Now you see why I’m not in a rush to cross this one off my list.  Maybe I’ll do a few more of these and THEN do this one…*nervous laugh*)

Things to Do:

Have a buddy record a video of you eating it.  Some people make really funny faces.

CHEW FIRST THEN SWALLOW.  DO NOT SWALLOW WHOLE!

Things to Remember:

“Death By Octopus” is not something you want on your tombstone. CHEW!

3--Boryeong Mud Festival (Boryeong, South Korea)

Korea has a festival for just about EVERYTHING.  But out of all their celebrations, this one draws the largest foreign crowd.  Head down to the beach and enjoy a day covered in mud!  From mud facials/massages to colored mud body paint to mud wrestling, there is plenty of excitement for people of all ages.  You’ll leave with your skin feeling great!

Things to Do:

Encourage someone you can release your pinned-up frustration on to mud wrestle with you.

Go down the giant mud slide—try not to scream or you will get mud in your mouth!

Turn yourself in and go to “mud prison.”

Enjoy the free concerts and other performances.

Visit the mud spa.

Party on the beach!

Get your body painted in colored mud.

Things to Remember:

Book your hotel or pension rooms EARLY.  Same thing applies for transportation both ways.

Don’t pack things that you’d be devastated if they were ruined.

Wear sunscreen and swimwear that can handle you being active.

Don’t get your hair done right before you go. ;-)

2--DMZ Tour (DMZ, S. Korea)

DMZ, or Demilitarized Zone is a true misnomer.  By definition, a demilitarized zone is a place where all military presence or function has been removed and forbidden.  Then why is this place the most heavily militarized border in the world?  This area serves as the buffer zone between North and South Korea.  Not only do I recommend this as a great historical site that explains a lot of the story behind Korea’s division and current relations, but for some, it presents a unique thrill of being in a dangerous place.  Even though there are rules and agreements in place, time and time again incidents have happened from someone disobeying orders, resulting in death at times.  Depending on the current relationship between the two countries, you may even be able to go into North Korea; but be careful.

Things to Do:

Tour one of the three tunnels open to tourists (4 tunnels in total)

Take pictures with soldiers (ask permission first)

Read up/watch mini documentaries on the history of that area

Buy souvenir(s)

See “propaganda village” in N. Korea as well as the large flagpole

Go to the JSA (Joint Security Area)

Visit the Gyeongui (KORAIL) line that connects the two Koreas

Things to Remember:

Sign up to go with a tour

Have your passport and/or ARC handy

Dress conservatively and neatly (check your tour’s exact dress code)

Take pictures in designated areas ONLY

1--Do a Temple Stay (all around S. Korea)

You don’t have to be Buddhist (or be concerned that they will try to convert you) to do a temple stay.  Korea has a few world renowned temples that are foreigner/non-Buddhist friendly.  I highly recommend Haein Temple (near Daegu).

Things to Do:

Take a vow of silence.

108 Prostrations (Yup, you’ll bow 108 times!)

Wake up at 3am to begin your day as a monk.

Practice meditating.

Talk to monk(s).

Take a hike.

Things to Remember:

All your actions should be with your “mind” (it’s the heart, not the brain).

Make sure you eat all the food you put on your tray.

Adhere to the temple rules.

No cameras during official ceremonies.

Dress conservatively.