The content of each post is solely written by that contributor and only expresses the contributor's personal views. Each post does not represent the views of all the contributors or Women of Color Living Abroad as an organization. Each contributor is speaking from their own person experiences and/or perspective.

Friday, February 8, 2013

The Scared Traveler: Saying Goodbye

The more I travel and strike up new friendships the more I have to part ways with those I find who have become my family. Growing up a middle child I never had an inkling of a feeling to be the focus of anyone’s attention. Maybe I did suffer from the fated middle child syndrome. The perpetual need to be in one’s own company due to lack of attention from those around you. As I've gotten older I find no need to abide by social rules when it comes to mere socializing with unfamiliar people. I've been regarded as standoffish and a social outcast among those that are the beautiful people of such circles. Having such a nature I take it to heart when inviting someone into my inner sphere. Those that I have gotten to know have come to realize like themselves I can be chatty, witty (sometimes) and an all around pleasant person whose company you can enjoy. When they are given the stamp of approval in my head I treat them like family, and will listen to them and give advice when needed.

Therefore, I have sought friends I can treat like family, and be able to share as I would those I'm connected to by blood. Living aboard I was lucky to find people not to share false acquaintances with, but to share true ideas and emotions. At times the relationship wasn't perfect, but what relationship has not been blemished. Through these friendships I've held council with those that offered the realist of advice, without the intention of offending, but with the goal of offering fresh perspectives to my troubled mind. I’ll be forever grateful to the few people that have touched my life, and they will be those that I will call on. For choosing such good friends of like mind, I was able to have wonderful experiences with them that I shall cherish for a lifetime.

Parting is such sweet sorrow (Romeo and Juliet Act 2 , Scene 2, 184) William Shakespeare
Going away day for celebrated with friends.
A quote I’m reminded of when I part with a friend I've come to share so much with. When having to part with people in our lives there is always a bitter-sweet feeling that’s consumes us, and cause for public displays of emotions. Images of the past cloud our minds of those that have captured our hearts in friendship. It seems as if we loose something in that moment of letting them go from our lives. Although, so much has been gained from the shared time it still doesn't lessen the blow we feel when saying goodbye. I'm no expert at goodbyes, and feel a sense of loss. No longer, are there moments when we laugh together in the same room nor of the vernaculars of each other’s home country we practice. These bitter-sweet moments are lost in a time we’ll never forget, but cherish each moment in each other’s presence that slips away every second that passes. Within one year, I will say goodbye to another friend I referred to as my family living aboard. Although, I'm dreading the passing of time, I know I can’t turn back time to enjoy being with each amazing person I met here in a foreign land.

For those finding themselves loosing such amazing people with the constant changing of time. Here are some helpful tips I use to help me cope with another friend moving somewhere else in the world.

*  Skpye, Yahoo Messenger, MSN messenger, Facebook,Kakao, What’s App and Viber will keep you in constant contact with those that are far from you.

*  Surrounding yourself with other people that you allow in your inner sphere will keep the feelings of loss at bay.

*  Use free time that was once occupied by others for learning, exploring or embracing something totally different it develops itself into a hobby.

*  Stay positive by your entire outlook on life. Everything is not a rose garden with delightful smells. Therefore, being positive about all things will give you clarity to your every changing life.

*  Look towards your future, as one day you will be moving on to better things that will make your heart content with all the experiences you have experienced on the journey you embarked upon.
Lewis, Courtney, Nas and Myself at Incheon Airport
I'm following these ideas to keep my mind in such a state I've a positive outlook on all things in my life. It’s not a perfect work of art when it comes to such things, but I don’t wallow in my changing circumstance. But I embrace all the experiences I've had that have made me such a person that my memories are those that I cherish to heart. When people enter and leave my life, I'm forever grateful and changed from that experience. 

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