When Eating Live Animals Goes Wrong: The Ultimate Crash Diet

By:  Brittany S

Interested in weight loss?  Have a little extra holiday weight you want to lose?  Trying to uncover your summer beach body?  Recently spend 6 weeks in America and gain 7 lbs (Too specific)?

Well I'VE GOT THE SOLUTION FOR YOU!

EAT SANNAKJI!

What is this "Sannakji" you ask?
A "killer" diet, that's what!  It is literally a diet to die for.


Why?
Because aside from being one of the most dangerous foods in the world, it can help you drop the lbs in a matter of DAYS!


"What do I have to do?!"
It's simple really.  Just watch this instructional video below:

Yes ladies and gentlemen, it is THAT SIMPLE and it only takes a few SECONDS!


Eat sannakji and your body will flush out waste over the next few days.  Drink plenty of water.


I personally have lost 6 or 7 lbs on this program.  I'm quite happy with the end result.  But don't just take my word for it.  Read some of our testimonals from actual product users:

ACTUAL PRODUCT USERS!

Testimonials:
Ebony--"I lost 4 lbs in one week...just in time for my wedding!"

LaToya--"I lost a few lbs and was able to take a vacation from work!"


Try it for yourself and discover the new you today!

What I discovered wasn't too exciting.

**Disclaimer:  This is not a true diet nor is it advocating for any type of "diet" or weight loss method that causes the body to lose weight in an unnatural way .  Side effects may include:  diarrhea, vomiting, lack of energy, weight, and pride, Yes, it did cause me and the people mentioned in the testimonials to lose weight by causing us to "flush out waste," but that definitely was not by choice!  Sannakji is really one of the most dangerous foods in the world.  It is live octopus.  Each tenticle has its own brain and even though the sannakji we were served was already chopped up, it continued to squirm.  If you do not chew this food quickly and thoroughly, it can cling to the inside of your cheek and/or your throat wall and cause you to choke to death.  This is not "a diet to die for" but it definitely is a "killer."  There are several deaths annually from this food.  If you decide to try this Fear Factor eligible food, please CHEW CHEW CHEW!

Also, I would suggest you learn from our mistake and eat something first.  We didn't eat beforehand and dined on not only raw octopus, but raw oysters as well.  We've decided that the oysters were the real culprit; the more oysters you ate, the sicker you were (out of the 7 of us who went there, 5 of us were extremely sick afterwards).  When I talked to a Korean person about it, he told me a lot of people have been getting the Norovirus from raw seafood lately.  That is definitely what it felt like.  This is definitely NOT a "date food."  I'd eat ribs or something else sloppy on a date before I'd eat this!  You've been warned.

I Ate Dog, Then I Saw His Kinfolk...Uh Oh

 By:  Brittany S

Yep, you read correctly.  You can stop wiping your eyes, or staring at the screen with your face scrunched up and head cocked to the side.  I, Brittany, ate dog…on purpose.  No I am not starving or in a third world country.  No I wasn’t on Fear Factor or the victim of a really demented dare.  I didn’t get paid for it and outside of this post, I didn’t really cause much of a fuss.  It was just a typical Saturday in Korea and I decided “I think I’ll eat dog today.”

            I know a few of you need a moment to process that.  I’m sure a few of you may feel you know me somewhat if you are a loyal reader of my posts.  I know at least a handful of people are reading this like “I was with you on everything, but DOG?! Really?!  You are on your own on that one.”  Need a moment?  Cool.  Take 5.  Look at this completely unrelated video to ease your mind.

            We good now?  Interested in Ameriquest...or maybe pick up on my subliminal message in the tagline?  Cool.  I know…the next thought after the “Eww!” or “OMG!” is “WHY?!” so here it is:  because they serve it.  I mean as long as it isn’t human (and hey, even that isn’t off limits for some people) and is considered a delicacy (or at least local cuisine) somewhere, then why not?  In my personal opinion, there is nothing wrong with eating dog, but Eastern cultures have started to shy away from it because of how Western (particularly American) cultures have made them feel about it.  Why is it gross or primitive to eat a dog?  I believe it is because we view dogs as household pets and family members at best.  How could you eat a member of the family!?  You savage individual you.  But hey, my Grandmommy had a pet chicken once, and you better believe she can fry a mean bird.

Such eager foreigners.  Our food was getting cold...

            Think about it, why shouldn’t we eat dog---because it is a pet?  Well in that case, Grandmommy eats her pet regularly.  I have a friend who had a pet cow named Oprah  (we are from the same state).  Do you think she doesn’t eat hamburgers or steak?  Ever have a pet fish?  So only the small ones are cute and shouldn’t be eaten but the big ones are fair game?  But you’re right…a dog is a “special” pet.  -_-

            Or maybe that is just unhealthy or unnatural in some way…perhaps even ungodly to have such a meal.  Without turning this into any type of spiritual conversation on what not to eat I will just say pork…really?  Pork is like THE most unhealthy meat we can consume.  No matter what we name it (bacon, ham, pork steak, sausage, pig feet, chitterlings/”chitlins”, etc), it is still terrible for our bodies.  Dog is actually a leaner meat and many Koreans believe it is good for your health.  But, I digress.

My friend was happy to share this part of her culture with me...just not happy that we took so many pictures. :-)

            Bottom line, my reason for eating dog is to say that I am embracing a part of their culture that my (American) culture rejects.  I ate it because I am learning to acculturate myself to the world’s culture and not just my own little piece of earth.  I ate it so the next time someone calls me a picky eater I can say “If only you knew…”  It made me feel a little like a daredevil, too.  Don’t be fooled; it played with my head a little when I saw the food in front of me.  I just scooped up a large spoonful and shoved it in my mouth before I could over-think it.  After that, it wasn’t that bad!

WARNING: First bite of dog causes you to change colors.

            I ate it in two forms: a bibimbap and a soup.  I prefer the bibimbap form.  The meat was lean and spicy.  It tasted a little like goat (yes I have eaten that, too…is that one off limits too? J Oh well…).  I sat there with my friends chatting away as if we were sharing a pizza.  Of course we took a TON of pictures (as it was my American friend’s first time eating it as well.  My Korean friend just shook her head and laughed at us.) to document our “Bucket List” event.  Would I eat it again?  Yes.  HOWEVER, I don’t see myself ever getting a craving and saying “Hey, let’s eat dog tonight!”  I WOULD however eat it again if a friend wanted to try it and was scared to do it on their own.  Friends don’t let friends eat dog alone. ;-)  In the meantime, bring on my Grandmommy’s pet chicken and my friend’s pet cow!

It comes out like this...

...then you add raw egg and white rice, stir, and VOILA!

It doesn't look so bad...right?

            The workers were so nice to us and very worried about us foreigners eating dog.  They constantly asked us if it was ok and if we thought it was delicious.  This is exactly what I mean.  Poor Koreans, all worried about what us foreigners think of something that makes them happy and isn’t really our concern.  After we finished eating, we were escorted to a bus stop and informed that it will take about 25 minutes before the next bus comes.  Not even three minutes later after we ate Fido, FeFe, and Fluffy, a dog goes sniffing around in the field in front of the restaurant.  We all just looked at each other like “Uh Oh.”

The victim...

            As time progressed and a bus still hadn’t come, we started making up a whole story about that dog.  It sniffed its way all the way to behind the restaurant and we pronounced him dead on arrival.  After we had a good laugh about it and the dog STILL didn’t resurface, we stopped smiling.  Where exactly do they get the dogs for the restaurant anyway?  I’ve never seen “Beef, Chicken, and Dog” listed at the grocery store.  We imagined the dog fell victim to a bug zapper meant for dogs and would soon be served up.  To make matters worse, shortly thereafter a man came walking by looking for something (or someone).  He practically traced the steps of the dog and eventually ended up behind the building…for a loooonnng time.  Oh great, now the bug zapper got him, too!  That explains why the field on the side of the restaurant looks like the earth was freshly turned.  Poor guy…didn’t stand a chance.

The crime scene...

            Just when we have completely turned our innocent dining experience into a sick horror story, our ride comes and it is time to leave this place.  Even in my brave moment of eating that meal, a tiny part of American me wondered where the dogs came from and felt sorry for the dog I saw.  What can I say, I can’t overcome everything at once—Rome wasn’t built in a day!

A Midnight Gondola Ride With Him…And His Missus Is Ok With It

By:  Brittany S

Last weekend was magical.  Even though I couldn’t understand what he was trying to say to me, I could look in his eyes and stare at his hands; they told me everything I needed to know.  He wanted me right here with him…and she knew.

 

Who is “he” you ask?  My Oppa  (오빠 "big brother")!  Who else?!  I know it has been a long time since I last wrote about him, but he and his family are still very much a part of my life.  Now that I live in a different city, I don’t see them nearly as often, but we definitely keep in touch!

                One day I messaged my Uhni (언니 "big sister") and she invited me to join them at a resort over the weekend.  ROADTRIP!  WOOHOO!  I was a bit nervous (as I always am when I go out of town with them, but last time it worked out alright), but I agreed.  They drove two hours to pick me up, then another two to our destination, with a random pit stop in between.

                On the way, 오빠 made a pit stop at a SHEEP FARM.  Yep.  I guess this isn’t very fascinating to me because I have driven and walked past fields with sheep many times in America, but for them, it was special.  But when my family found out there was a fee to get closer to the sheep (less than $5USD), they decided it was too expensive, so we left…but not before they fed me.

                Even though I ate before getting in the car, I was immediately handed Mandarin oranges and a hot sweet potato. At the sheep farm, they bought me a corn dog.  There was even a point where I was forced to bite off one of theirs, after they gnawed at mine.  Sharing is caring!  But they weren’t done!  They know I love meat more than vegetables, so they make it a point to cook a lot of meat anytime I am around.  This time was one for the record books.  They bought a TON of steak, links, and hot dogs (and were very apologetic that it wasn’t American beef, but Australian.  *shrugs*).  They made so much meat I thought I was going to be sick!  I ate until I couldn’t anymore, then a little more just for them.  We laughed and talked in broken English and Korean until we moved on to games.

                I usually just play “Blue Marble” with all the kids (like a Korean ‘Monopoly’), but this time the adults decided to play a game as well.  They taught me (with gestures, 2 or 3 English words, and Korean) how to play Yutnori.  We played with our family (오빠, his son, and me) against the other family (they traveled with us last time).  We won the first game and lost the next two.  I blame the player substitutions!  While I was playing with the kids, 오빠 said he wanted to go on a “Gondola ride date” with me and asked if that was ok.  I looked at his wife for clarification (as there aren't any Gondolas at the ski resort right?) and she said yes and go.  I STILL have no idea where this gondola came from, but I suppose this is our next adventure?*

After games, dinner, and drinks, we headed outside to check out the resort premises.  Even though we hadn’t had the first snow, ski season had begun so there was artificial snow everywhere, with the ski slope directly outside our windows.  One of the men in the group is a professional photographer.  I don’t know if it was the soju or his wife, but he suddenly was inspired to have an impromptu photo shoot on the snow using only his camera phone.  As we giggled and ran away from him (he drunkenly chased us, too!), he snapped pics.  He finally convinced us to start posing and he told me he loves my silly poses.  That’s all I needed to hear; I went into full Naomi mode, making the rest of the Koreans to blush. We had a good time!  It was fun to watch the rest of the men and boys have a snowball fight.

She laughed so hard she started crying haha

What? He told me to pose in the snow! She wasn't ready...

                By now I am worn out, but they are still going strong.  The children were instructed to perform to “Gangnam Style” for the adults.  They were even assigned parts and given an iPad to go watch the video for practice.  That was fun.  It was funny to see the kids being forced to dance in a totally different culture than my own; moments like that make me feel at home here.  I stayed awake long enough to watch the performances, then was dismissed to go to bed.  My family could see the fatigue all over my face so my 언니 came to the ladies’ room (we stayed in a 2 bed/2 bath condominium villa) and tucked me in my floor mat.  She laid her mat out next to mine and for a minute I thought she was about to try to share a mat with me.  Instead, she gently caressed my face and said she loves me as if she was putting her little girl to bed.  Sometimes you would never guess that she is only 13 years older than me!

The beautiful wife who inspired this photo shoot. (LEFT)

                Later, 언니 returned to go to bed.  When she thought I was sleep, she held my hand and fell asleep.  Even though I don’t understand everything she says, I always understand everything she does.  She really loves me.  We slept hand-in-hand for hours (when I finally fell asleep that is!  I was laying on my back and she on her stomach.  After so long, I was uncomfortable!  I wanted to roll over!).  Around 5:30am, I woke up to use the bathroom.  Little did I know that one of the other ladies was awake and would start talking to me when I returned.  That eventually woke the other ladies, who woke the children, who woke the men.  The whole house was awake and LIVELY before 6am!  Next time I will just hold it :-).  I just KNEW I was going to be able to lie back down and continue sleeping!  WRONG!

                I had to leave the resort earlier than everyone else because I had an appointment in Seoul.  Before I left, 오빠 insisted on making me breakfast.  He even Westernized it a little for me by making fried eggs and Salisbury steaks to go with the meal.  Because I am not much of a drinker, everyone made it a point to keep my glasses filled with OJ and water.  The men drove me to the bus terminal and one of the women even rode the bus with me to Seoul to make sure I would be ok.  They are sooooo considerate and hospitable.  오빠and 언니 announced to everyone that they want to be able to communicate with me more fluidly, but they are old so they will not study English.  Instead, I have been instructed to continue my study of the Korean language.  I am trying…people like that are all the more motivation for me to learn.  (OPPA AND UHNI, I LOVE YOU!...오빠랑 언니, 사랑해요! )

*My 오빠 believes we are closer than his wife and I are, so he insists on his 1-on-1 time to further his lead if you will.*

The Scared Traveler: A Slight Change in Plans

Dottie Hill

I think there is a saying that goes something like this, “Even the best laid plans change.” I know the universe will not always bring sunny skies nor will it allow all of your cards to fall into place. So, a planned trip with friends has its ups and downs. What happens when one friend is prepared, and they can no longer take the trip but you aren’t prepared? For anyone that knows this, it can spell disaster while scrambling to make the most of an unprepared vacation. The one thing that can make a vacation less of a disaster is choosing the perfect place to stay. Luckily, for me that’s what I did even when one friend who possessed the know-how of the vacation spot could no longer go. The central location of the hostel I stayed at proved to be a blessing in disguise. Not only were there great places to see in the city center the location provided easy access to other places nearby using the subway or bus.



Forbidden City

With so much to see I was clueless to all the great tourist spots and not so great spots. Since I’m a firm believer in relying on the kindness of others, I did just that. This kind person happened to be the clerk at the hostel. What I got was more than what I was looking for. Not only did the person at the front desk give me a map of the historical places of the city, he also gave me a subway map. As I talked with him he mapped out everything I was interested in seeing on my map, and even provided information about great places the locals go in the city.



Street Food

As I explored the city and saw lots of things I couldn’t help but wonder how interesting it was without knowing anything before I came. I can tell you, if you decide to go to Beijing make sure you bring a great pair of walking shoes. There is so much to see in this city and different kinds of foods to try as well. Although, my palate screeched at the thought of candied fruit, it loved the steamed pork dumplings. Not surprising, there were no short supplies of familiar western food chains (McDonald’s and KFC). As always Starbucks is never hard to find anywhere you go, but seeing a Haagen Dazs store made my day.

For travelers like me or the most prepared travelers here are a few tips you may consider when traveling. Remember a great hotel or hostel will provide travelers with up to date maps of the city and/or subway lines. These are great sources for understanding where you are and getting an idea of where you want to go. Don’t just take the map and GOOGLE “sites to see in …” Talking with the person at the front desk will give you good insight to the city. Here are a few questions I asked the clerk on my recent vacation:

What’s a good place to eat around here? 

The Great Wall of China

Where do the locals go to shop?

Where are the clubs and bars?

Where are the bars the locals go to?

Is it easier to get to ... by bus or subway?

Which bus should I take?

Do you offer tours to different sites?

Where are the movie theaters?

Where are the running parks?



Tiananmen Square

These questions are general enough to get the desk clerk talking. Make sure you include questions that are geared towards things you like. Also, while you are chatting with this person, remember to have them outline places on your map. This will give you a better idea as to how far certain places are, and help you at planning your time. Then you will be able to choose where you want to go, and know if it’s a great place to visit.

Having a handy dandy app is a must for a scared and unprepared traveler like me. One of my favorite travel apps is Triposo. It’s an interactive travel guide that uses the web to give information on popular travel destinations around the world. You can download the guides you want on your phone and they’re all free. It has information from history to food and culture as well as maps. Although, I went on my vacation clueless I managed to have a great time. I hope that you are able to have an adventure whether you are prepared or not.

Good Luck!